Jackson Brown sings in The Pretender, “They say in the end, it’s the blink of an eye”. It is not so much that time seems to be flying by; it is just that life never stops. We have the ability to quiet our minds in order to fully take in the present moment, but soon that moment is gone and another takes its place. Sometimes, when I ponder the life I lived for the first twenty years, it feels like a different life – a different me altogether. In those moments, I feel as if I have been here forever. On the other hand, it seems that my life has passed me by because before I knew it, I had become a grandmother. I am now a great grandmother and that seems nearly inconceivable.
My grandchildren appear to have grown up overnight, not unlike Jack in the Beanstalk. I cannot figure why, but it seems that the grandchildren have grown up much faster than my own children grew. All but the three youngest grandchildren (who are now twelve years old) are now driving. This definitely feels like it happened in the blink of an eye. I have failed to stop often enough to savor those moments when grace preceded and enveloped me in its warm light. Mondays became Fridays, which became Sundays, which turned into the next month, and then the next year. I now refer to the events in my life in terms of decades – decades which I am quickly running out of. I am no longer aware of becoming older. I am aware that I am entering the final chapter of my personal saga. How long or short this chapter is, is not in my hands. I will make the best of the time that remains. It does not matter if my grandchildren remember me, or if they don’t. What matters is that I do all I can today to leave the world a little nicer for them.
